Hello Mr. Wrong

My weekly post is up at the The IDD Blog today.  I'm posting it here, too. 


 Before we begin I want to point out something that you will probably realize as you read on.  I am not a believer in the idea that Courtship can save you from a broken heart.  Neither do I believe that "Dating With a Purpose" or for that matter ANY kind of relationship method can prevent broken hearts.  Broken hearts happen.  In fact, God ALLOWS hearts to break.  And if He does than it's all for our own good.  To "bring us to an expected end."  I believe that God has the perfect person out there for each of us.  I believe that God will bring two people together.  I believe that if a couple places their relationship in God's hands He will direct the relationship so that it remains pure and God-honoring.


    There are many, many, many, many, many "Successful Courtship" Stories out there.  Every couple has one.  And they're all sweet and inspiring and encouraging.  What we don't see as often are the "Failed Courtship" stories.  I'm convinced it's not because they're not out there.  There are obvious reasons for not sharing this kind of thing.  It's a personal matter, and I'm certainly not saying that everyone should publish their "Failed Courtship" stories.  But, it's good for us to understand that this kind of thing does and can happen.  (Incidentally, I don't actually believe in "failed" relationships.  If two people enter a relationship toward marriage with the idea that God will direct them and show them how/if they should get married, and it ends up not working, it wasn't meant to work.  In that case, I would have to call it a "successful relationship."  We certainly wouldn't want two people to get married just because they started a courtship/relationship if they discover it's not meant to be.  In these cases God has a much better match for each of them.) 

  
    The other thing that we never hear of but I believe MUST happen more than we think is the relationship that fails before it even gets off the ground.  Before it progresses to the "Courtship/Dating/Dorting/RELATIONSHIP" stage.  I'll be up front and honest here.  It's happened to me.  Twice.  It's happened to some of my friends. It's important to know we're not immune to this sort of thing just because we've committed ourselves to a higher standard of purity. 

   

    I'll be honest.  It's hard.  For those of us who believe in "Courtship", "Dating-With-A-Purpose", "Dorting" or whatever you choose to call it there's a seriousness of thought that comes with all potential relationships.  When I was in my teens and early 20s I never thought of any scenario except a perfect one.  I imagined a guy approaching me about starting a relationship.... Of course I said yes!  I was already in love with him!  Or, I imagined getting to know a guy as a friend and gradually falling in love, and when we both realize what is happening it's obvious we're destined to be together forever.  Or, my dad comes to me "Rebecca, 'So-and-so' has asked to start a relationship with you.  What do you think?"  And I take it to prayer and recieve a resounding "YES!" from God, and a "YES!" from my parents and fall madly in love and live happily ever after.  *sigh*  It seemed impossible to me that all the right components could be there without adding up to the right answer.  I never once imagined that a Godly, nice guy would approach me about starting a relationship and the train would come jerking to a halt.  And yet, that's exactly what happened. 

    I'll walk you through the emotional rollercoaster that is a potential relationship. 
            A) Guy approaches you/your father/however you think it should go

            B) Hope ignites.  At this point I think to myself "This could be it! I've been waiting my whole life for this to happen, and now it's happening!  Could this really be it?"  Not to mention the heart-warming "He LIKES me!"  Wow.  I mean, surely he wouldn't be attracted to me if it wasn't God's will.  Right?  Um, wrong.  Guys can struggle with crushes and attractions just like us girls. 

            C) You take it to prayer.  At this point you become aware that you do NOT already have feelings for this guy.  The place in your heart that supposed to be going "ZING!" is rather... empty. 

            D) Then the questions you ask yourself.  Is this guy really the one for me, but I'm immune to falling in love with him?  Am I destined to be married to someone I don't love?  Or, am I supposed to marry him because all the lights are green (except my heart) and eventually I'll "grow to love him"... maybe. 
      I remember a time when my Dad asked me how it was going with a certain guy.  This guy was interested in starting a relationship with me.  I wasn't so sure...  I looked at my dad while trying to sort my thoughts into a coherent sentence that would somehow communicate every question, concern, uncertainty, fear, hope, dread and depression that I felt all swirling around in my heart and Dad interpreted it all into one brief fragment of a sentence. "No spark, huh?"  Wow.  Relief.  "Yeah, no spark."  He just nodded and walked away.  As if to say "Well, that's that.  No spark."  Yeah.  No spark.  What a relief to understand that there is SUPPOSED to be a spark.  If there's not, Red Light. 
            Of course, no spark isn't the only reason you should nip a relationship in the bud.  There are MANY other things to consider.  Do you agree with this guy on all important subjects?  Doctrine, Child-raising, are you compatible?  I could write another whole article on these subjects but these issues have mostly already been addressed by more qualified people than myself. 

            E) The dread.  The doubt.  This could really be it.  The last train for marriage-ville.  I'm not getting any younger.  This guy is attracted to me.  He'd probably take good care of me.  If I don't agree to go with him...  there's a good chance no one else will ever ask me.  I could be doomed to spinster-hood!!!!!  In the infamous words of Mr. Collins of Pride and Prejudice fame "...You should take it into further consideration that, in spite of your manifold attractions, it is by no means certain that another offer of marriage may ever be made to you."

            F) The decision.  The "breaking it off."  Is it really breaking it off if it never even starts? 

            G) Then the guilt.  I probably really hurt this guy's feelings.  Now I feel like an ice queen.  Am I incapable of love? 

            H) Back to the single life.  Except now I feel even more single than ever.   

            I) Then the self questioning. "God, why did You allow this to happen?"  For me, this is one of the hardest parts.  As Jessie Brown says in Cranford "It's not the despair that hurts, but the hope."  Even if your hope never materializes into the feelings you hope it will... the disappointed hope can still leave a bruise that may take a long time to heal. 

   A friend said to me the other day "God will allow our desires (even good ones) to be tested."  This is so true!  False start relationships can be discouraging, believe me I know!  But, it's always better to look on the bright side.  Be thankful for the experience!  Be thankful that God is working in you!  Be thankful that you made the right decision!  Know that God doesn't walk us through darkness for no reason.  He tests us because He loves us.  Every test and trial we go through is one more test or trial behind us.  Don't give up!  
          
If there's three things I want you to understand they would be these:

•     Just because a guy wants to start a relationship with you doesn't mean he's the one.  I consider marriage a very serious decision to be made.  A possible relationship should be seriously considered.  But, don't fall into the way of thinking that a possible relationship is automatically THE relationship.  If there's a perfect man out there for you, there are no rules saying he has to be the first to ask.
•    Trust your gut instincts.  God will not ask you to marry someone you don't love or feel right about.  If he really is the one for you God will make it clear to BOTH of you.
  
•    Don't allow yourself to doubt.  There's nothing wrong with you.  Everything in our lives should contribute to our growth.  And God will use any situation to draw you closer to Him.  And there IS a perfect someone for you somewhere out there.  Don't get discouraged.

I know many girls will never have to deal with this sort of thing.  But, I also know that some of us will.  Please don't give up hope or feel alone. 

I believe in happy endings.  If it's not happy... it's not the end.

Book Haul

Shopping at Borders after church on Sunday. :)  First a yummy lunch at Panera during which Debi and Katie and I yacked about books.

I picked up:

The Boxcar Children by Gertrude Chandler Warner

Ok, I'd like to know who read this book as a child.  If you have, leave me a comment.  I'd forgotten how much I loved it.  I probably haven't read it in 18 years, but as I looked at the cover it all came flooding back to me.  The characters, plot line, funny stories... the whole thing.  Man, I loved that book.  I'm hoping my little brother Luke will love it too.

The Body in the Library by Agatha Christie

Ordinarily I like to buy my Agatha Christie books in lots from E-bay.  I can get 10+ books usually for about a dollar a book.  I don't worry about getting duplicates of books I already own because usually these books are old and sometimes in very bad condition.  So, I keep the one that's in the best condition.  If I have two that are in good condition I'll give one away.  Or, keep saving them until I have enough to sell my own lot on E-bay.
But, back on the subject.  I picked this one up because I really want to read it.  *shrug*


A guy was playing guitar in the coffee shop while we book browsed.  He sounded amazing, so once I'd found what I was looking for I peeked around the corner to watch him work his magic.  And it was.  Just. Like. Magic.  Fingers flying.... For some reason watching such genius at work made my heart happy.  I decided to walk away before someone noticed the goofy grin on my face and classified me as a lunatic.  I was having August Rush type feelings.  August Rush, by the way.... I.... LOVE.

After Katie was done shopping I dragged her over to "see this guy playing guitar, it's amazing" but she got distracted by another genius musician who happened to be walking through the bookstore and stopped to chat with her.  Oh, the life of a talented musician who knows other talented musicians...

Random Update

• I just got an e-mail from Amazon.com telling me two very cool things.  1) That the books I pre-ordered a month ago were shipped yesterday which means I should be getting them early next week.  Three books I've been anxious to read for...  well, ever since I knew they were going to be published.  And 2) That one of the books went down in price after I ordered it and Amazon charged me the decreased price.  Isn't that sweet?
• Yesterday I read The Tale of Despereaux.  This in itself was a huge step towards conquering my murophobia.  Reader do you know what murophobia is?  I will tell you.  FEAR OF MICE.  Yep.  The phrase "Despereaux scurried across the floor" sends shivers down my spine.  I have not completely conquered the phobia.  But, reading the book was certainly an overcoming experience.  In other semi-related news, I loved the book!
• Quest.  Say it, Reader.  Say the word 'quest' out loud.  It is an extraordinary word, isn't it?  So small, yet so full of wonder, so full of hope."
• Started Savvy last night by Ingrid Law.  
• I'm going to a wedding today.  The wedding isn't until 4:30 and I have the whole day off work!  I have all day to make myself beautiful!  HA!  So, I'll probably still read until the last minute and then throw some makeup on before I rush out the door.  
• Our Bible Study group started reading Do Hard Things.  I'm looking forward to being inspired by the message even though it's geared towards teens and I'm, um, not a teen.  Actually no one in my group is a teen.  Ok, one teen. The rest of us are in our mid-20s to 30s.  But, we can still be inspired by a book about rebelling against low expectations, right?  
• I have a green face.  It's a Mint-Juniper Facial Mask.  And I love it.  But, my sisters like to mock scream when they see me wearing it.  I just feel like bursting into song "I think i'll try defying gravity!"
• Evidently I have nothing more interesting to say.  Hope you all have a great weekend!
  

Stories

Stories are light. 

Light is precious in a world 

so dark. 

-The Tale of Despereaux, Kate DiCamillo

Happy Endings

I believe in 

 

Happy Endings...

 If it's not happy...

It's not the end!

September Book List

84.  Among the Barons by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (****) Fourth installment in the Shadow Children series.  Pretty good.  Kind of a lot happened in just one short book, but I kept up with it fairly well, which is a sign of a good author.  Lots of double crossings and not knowing who's on what side.  Looking forward to book 5.

85.  Among the Brave by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (*****) Fifth Shadow Children book.  You've probably realized by now (as have I) that I like this series.  Among the Brave is one of my favorites I think.

86.  The Children on the Top Floor by Noel Streatfeild- (***) Very cute and loveable in typical Noel Streatfeild style. 

87.  The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins- (****) Reviewed HERE

88.  Among the Enemy by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (***)  I like these books in case you couldn't tell already.  I'm not going to say EVERYONE should read them, because obviously they're not going to be some people's cup of tea.  But, you might want to at least give the first one a try and see if you like it.  'Cause I really did. 

89.  Among the Free by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (***) Nice ending to the series. :)

90.  The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien- (***) Um... I had a hard time getting through this book.  This time was actually my 2nd attempt.  I don't know what it is...  I was interested in the plot, and it's very well written.  I'm hoping the next 2 books pick up the pace a little though...

91.  The Giver by Lois Lowry- (****) Interesting...  Thought provoking and somewhat disturbing.  I'm interested to read the others in the series.

92.  Roses for Mama by Janette Oke- (***)  Sweet.  :)

93.  Passenger to Frankfurt by Agatha Christie -(**)  *YAWN*  Is this plot going anywhere?  I hung out to the end of the book because I kept expecting it to get better, or maybe for the whole thing to make sense. I guess it did all make sense in the end, but the entire plot lacked in anything thrilling.  I hate to rate my favorite author so low, but this book is proof that even the best don't always have such brilliant ideas. 

94.  Gathering Blue by Lois Lowry- (***) First of all the title is just amazing.  Don't you think?  The art work on the cover was blah, though.  As for the story, it took me a while to get into it.  But, I did enjoy it in the end.  Highly Predictable plot. 

95.  Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine - (****)  Very cute and sweet Cinderella re-telling. If you object to fantasy be warned this... is a fairy-tale. 

96.  The Family at Caldecott Place by Noel Streatfeild - (****)  Typical Streatfeild= sweet, adorable, resourceful. 

Pumpkin Art

I love pumpkins.  :)

I love fall and I love pumpkins.  :)

I DO cook with pumpkins, but my favorite thing to do with pumpkins is decorate with them!

Here's some fun ways to dress up plain pumpkins.

Use tape to make a design on your pumpkin.  Remember that the design you make will be a negative of the finished product.  You'll be decorating on the un-taped parts of the pumpkin.  So, wherever you put the tape will be pumpkin colored when you are done.

Now comes the fun part.  You can use whatever you want to decorate.  Paint, Decorative pins, Ribbon, Glitter, whatever you like.

For this particular pumpkin I sprayed the entire thing with spray adhesive glue which you can get in any hardware or craft store.  Or, you can make your own spray-on glue by mixing glue with water. 

Then I generously dumped black glitter all over the entire pumpkin.  Put something underneath to catch the extra glitter.  You can put it back into the container to use later.

Let it dry.

Remove the tape and decorate to your hearts content!

Try using different colored paints or glitters for custom looks.  Here's a few more I did just to help get your creative juices flowing. :)

Beware!  This project is addicting!  I almost couldn't stop!  

Have fun!  Be creative!  Give them as gifts! 

Book Review: The Hunger Games

Um, WOW.  Just wow.  I really had no idea what I was getting into when I started this book.  Takes place in the future, in a sort of altered reality.  I guess technically it would qualify as science fiction.  The pace was awesome, kept me riveted enough that I polished off all 350 some pages in one day.  I DID stay up rather late.  But, I couldn't put it down!!  

Some cautions though!!!!! I would NOT recommend this book to everyone.  The girl that recommended it to me said it best when she told me she liked it but "felt guilty for liking it since it's SO violent."  I agree.  WAY violent.  But, that's part of the author's point.  She's exploring the effects of war and violence on young people.  (I seem to be caught in a rut of reading YA books all about corrupt governments lately...)  

Anyway, the story is like some sort of hideous coliseum type fight-to-the-gruesome-bloody-death-kill-before-you-get-killed reality tv show.  With 24 contestants.  Sound awful?  It is.  It REALLY is.  Again, I would NOT recommend this book to just anyone.  Yes, it's a YA book, written for teens.  That doesn't mean I think every teen should read it.  Remember, I'm closer to my 30s than I am to my teens...  

Good things: The characters deal with extreme situations and Suzanne Collins is very adept at handling that.  I think their reactions are excellent.  Good vs. Evil.  The characters deal with not being overcome by evil in the midst of it.  They struggle of course (very realistically) but I think it's handled really well.

Bad things:  Violence.  Violence.  Did I mention VIOLENCE?  A little too much romance, more than is tasteful in a YA book, in my opinion, although the romance IS a necesssary part of the plot, so I guess it's understandable.  And it's predictable.  When an author writes themselves into a corner like that and it's a YA book...  well, I'll just say that when you KNOW things are going to have to turn out ok and you KNOW that certain things will have to happen... and certain things CAN'T happen, there's usually only one road out of that corner.  Also, it's the first book in a trilogy.  And the second book only came out a few days ago.  And this ending is somewhat wrapped up, but it does leave you hanging.  Honestly, I'm kind of wondering what the second book is going to be about... but I'm anxious to read it anyway.  Even if I know it DOES end in a cliff-hanger and I have no idea WHEN the third book might be coming out.  

All in all, this book rather enthralled me.  I stayed up shamefully late to finish reading it. (Some of the riveting suspense may have been sharpened by the cold, rainy, dark, quiet night...).  And the next morning I told my sister the whole story.  She was riveted too.  


But, if you're squeamish about violence and excessive cold-blooded murder... you might want to stay away from this one. 

Weekend Fun!

Sarah Beth and Luke join in on an impromptu jam session at the historical re-enactment.  Authentic "Antique" instruments like maracas and drums and frogs.  :)

They helped make beautiful music with classic songs like "Old McDonald Had a Farm."

Sarah Beth LOVES the Carousel.  :)

Bedroom Decor [Image Heavy]

As long ago promised....

Pictures of my bedroom!  I actually didn't do any redocorating at all except painting the one wall red.

Here's a 360 view.

Immediately to your left when you walk into the room:

Bookshelves.  The Rocking Chair was a gift from my grandparents as was the Pashmina draped over the back.  The stuffed animals...  well...  Just because I'm 27 doesn't mean I need to pack them away, right?

Then the bed (I did get a new comforter and sheets at K-Mart.  My old ones were getting to the hideous stage.  Comforter was super cheap.  $20, I think, and the sheets were one of those BOGO sales.)

 Step by step instructions on how to How to make the wall art HERE

 

Desk/Vanity
(By the way, the floor is STAINED.  It's not dirty.  :-) )

Closeups of my Vanity

Dirty Makeup Brushes

Semi-Organized Makeup

Earrings hanging :)

Necklaces and Bracelets.  (I don't have a lot of necklaces, I guess I don't wear them much)

Hopechest my Grandpa made for me :)

Piano.

So that's my bedroom!  The decorating and color scheme have sort of evolved over time.  I'm not the type to pick out the colors and decorate and then keep it the same way forever.  I'm always changing things up.  :)  I love this color combo right now though.  :)  The curtains and pillows I made out of inexpensive Walmart fabric (back when Walmart still sold fabric) and the rest of it was easy, inexpensive stuff. 

Sometimes...

I wish I'd lived in the 1940's

During the Foyle's War time.

So when my sister says "Hey, Rebecca, wanna be a Jewish girl in my skit?"  I'm like: "SURE!"
Then of course I spend an hour researching hairstyles... 
And an hour trying to get my middle-of-my-back length hair into a "bob"
Then I do my makeup (Oh JOY!  RED LIPS!!)
I pick out my favorite vintage jewelry.

I'm so loving it.  :)

You may have already noticed...

I got a new blog template earlier this week.  Thanks to Katie who put it up for me.  I can never figure out how to do it without losing all my widgets...
I got the template from Simply Fabulous Blogger Templates as usual...  :)  It was one of the freebies.
AND... a new profile picture!  Courtesy of Stephanie
What do you think?

Garden Bruschetta

This is one of my all-time favorite things to do with garden produce.

NOTE: This is not a picture of my bruschetta.  We gobbled ours up so fast I forgot to take a picture. 

• Chopped fresh TOMATOES.  (I like to use red and yellow tomatoes, if I have them.  Yellow tomatoes tend to be sweeter)
  
• Cubed CHEESE.  I like Swiss, but experiment and use whatever kind you want!
• Fresh chopped BASIL, oh my gooodness... to. die. for.  Especially if it's fresh from your garden.
• Drizzle of OLIVE OIL.  Extra Virgin is best.
• GARLIC (optional, I guess, if you don't like garlic)
  
• Pinch of SALT.
• FRENCH BREAD, sliced.  (I used French bread, but you can really use any kind you like)

Toast the bread with a little butter.  Pile on the Bruschetta.  It's love.  :)

I wish I was drinking coffee

Green Tea instead. 

Actually, it's not bad.  Kind of tastes good in a grass-y kind of way. 

I don't mind it. 

I've finally decided to start drinking the green tea that I bought a while ago because I had heard that green tea is So Very Good For You. 

Kind of funny really, since normally I don't rush out to do something the minute I find out it's good for you.  In fact I almost never do.  I am the girl that Does Not Take Vitamins.  Not because I don't have any.  Because I just don't.  I forget to take them.  And, trust me I've heard plenty of arguments for taking vitamins.  I know I should. 

But, I digress. 

I've started drinking green tea. 

And that's actually the whole point of this post.

Teamwork

For the IDD Blog


There is a picture in my head that I will never forget.
It was a sunny day in Florida and we were at a church picnic.  Someone was organizing games for the children and oneof them was "tug-o-war."  I wandered down to see what the kids were up to and enjoy their antics.  I'll never forget the lesson I learned next.  Some of the children decided to challenge some of the dads to a game of "tug-o-war."  The dads were against it at first, afraid they'd hurt the kids, but finally gave in... and lost.  The dads recruited reinforcements... and lost again.  More dads came.  More kids joined the kids side.  Again and again, those little kids pulled the dads slipping and sliding across the finish line.  I stood on the sidelines with some of the moms and watched in awe, we cheered at first, but as we continued to watch silence descended among us.  There was something amazing about this.  The dads had all the muscle, all the strength, but the kids had the TEAMWORK.  They had a person on the sidelines keeping the beat. "PULL!  PULL!"  Every single little foot moved in rhythym, every hand pulled in time.  Every time they out-pulled ten or twelve dads.



Teamwork goes beyond individual strengths.
Andrew Carnegie said that "[Teamwork] is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results."


In my life I have been blessed to be involved in many different situations that have taught me the value of teamwork.  Families are the first place to start.  Every family should function as a team and every member is vital to making that happen.  I was having a story-swapping session with a co-worker recently and she said: "You and your sisters (referring to the two sisters I share a house with) don't fight, do you?  You don't seem like you do.   That's amazing."  I felt like I had to clarify.  "We DO disagree," I responded, "And we do talk about our disagreements and sometimes there are hurt feelings, but we don't FIGHT."  I thought about that for a minute.  Why don't we fight?  I can think of one reason, my mom didn't ALLOW us to fight when we were little.  We're not in the habit of fighting when we have problems.  When we had a disagreement as children my mom's constant response was "Work it out."  Just work it out.  Make it work.  You'll probably have to give a little.  You may have to give a lot.  But, work it out.  Because whatever you work out between all of you is going to be stronger and better than whatever you were going to do by yourself with no support. 


I worked at a fast food restaurant.  It is absolutely impossible to run a restaurant through a busy lunch hour by yourself.  Similarly, you can have a big crew, but if everyone is trying to do everything themselves or nothing themselves it will be equally impossible. 

My current job is somewhat different.  I'm a florist, and a lot of the projects I work on are individual efforts.  I design bouquets by myself, but my boss is a HUGE advocate of teamwork.  At the end of a busy day she never forgets to say "Great job guys! See what we can accomplish with teamwork?"  It's the kind of team where we bring everything we have to the table, we depend on each other's strengths and cover each other's weaknesses.  We make it a point to encourage each other and learn from each other.  I'm a better floral designer because I work with other good floral designers.  We ask each other's advice and opinions.  Because we know we're stronger that way.  The shop is stronger and does better that way.  And if the shop does better WE do better.  Ultimately, we're looking out for each other, and each other's lives and families. 


And that's what teamwork is all about.  It's really true that
Together Everyone Achieves More

SORRY...

I've been so AWOL again...
I honestly have no excuse.

I did take pictures of my bedroom but I wasn't really happy with how they turned out.  My bedroom is kind of small and I had a hard time getting the angles I wanted.  I have an idea that I might borrow my brother's camcorder and try to do a video but don't hold your breath.  :)  I'm not in the least technilogically minded.... I'm not sure I could figure out how to do that...

In other re-decorating news...  The bathroom is done!  Katie finished the curtains and she and Stephanie hung a new wall shelving unit and it looks SO cute!  I can't wait to show you all that too, except, once again... I don't know how... the bathroom is WAY tinier than the bedroom.

I'm thinking of the 9/11 victims and their families today.  Commemorative posts on the IDD Blog today.

Oh, guess what?  My boss bought some new (used) vehicles yesterday!!  So exciting!  Especially considering the van we were previously using was literally duct-taped together.  And running REALLY rough.  My boss wouldn't allow anyone to drive it out of town.  She took all the out-of-town deliveries herself because she didn't want any of us to be the ones stranded on the side of the road standing next to a junk heap.  We joked that anyone that drove it should just get out and walk for a while if they started to feel sleepy...  :)  It wasn't actually leaking Carbon Monoxide (yet) but it was almost there...  So, we have a new station wagon for driving around town and a new mini-van for delivering big loads to funerals and for pulling our trailer.  Very excited about that. 

And... I can't think of anything else interesting to say.  I hope you all have a good weekend!  I hope some people are still checking in even though I haven't been posting regularly!  I'm really sorry about that!!  I'll try to do better!

Have Mercy on Me

Dear Girls,

It's hard to write something encouraging when you're not being encouraged yourself.  Today I'm sharing with you something that has encouraged me when I was low.  Sometimes it helps to admit that we're afraid or that we're lost.  Sometimes when I'm discouraged the first thought that gives me any hope is the knowing that I AM discouraged.  God is bigger than my discouragement.  He's bigger than my life.  He has good plans for me.  And He has good plans for you.  There are days when I don't see Him moving.  There are days when I'll swear He's forgotten all about me.  But, all along that's only my own little mind that can't see Him.  It doesn't mean He isn't there.  Peter Marshall once said "How can my tiny mind prove God?"  

When I first heard this song I was in my car driving home from work.  It's a good thing I know that route like the back of my hand.  Tears were streaming down my face.  This song describes my life.  And the truth of it hurt my heart.  I've listened to this song many times since then.  But, I'll be honest.  There are times when it comes on my CD player and I push the 'skip' button.  Because I just can't handle it right then.  

I hope it encourages you too.  And I hope anyone reading this today knows that God cares about them more than they even care about themselves.  You may be worrying about your future, but God's not.  He's got it covered.  And if you're struggling with even believing that, than just know that I've been there too.  Many times.  There's nothing wrong with admitting that we have struggles, that we have doubts.  Sometimes I just feel like I have to be honest with God.  I tell Him exactly what I'm thinking.  I don't hold anything back.  I tell Him I'm afraid of everything.  I tell Him I wonder if He's still there.  I challenge Him to prove to me that He is.  

The amazing thing is: He always does.  Not always right away.  Sometimes I have to struggle more.  Sometimes I have to wait.  But, He ALWAYS DOES.  

I'm tired of being afraid

I'm wondering how I got this way

I'm trying to remember what life was like before

Panic moved in without even knocking on the door

Have mercy on me

I'm not who I used to be

Have mercy on me

Jesus please

I've been praying and asking you to take it all away

You never do exactly what I say

You see me from the outside

A lover looking in

But, all I see is danger moving underneath my skin

I know it's not because I don't love you enough

It's not because I'm weak, it's how you choose to speak to me

- J.J. Heller

Plans for Labor Day?

I don't have any plans yet.  (That I know of) 

None have developed. 

I DO have a list of "potential" plans. 

They are:

• Read
• Finish the paint touching-up in the bathroom
• Possibly shop for fall/winter clothes

And that's it.  And that would be lovely, lovely, lovely if I could get those things done on Labor Day.

In other news, I'm going to a football game on Saturday. 
I DO plan to take some pictures of my room re-painted and post them here for you guys (some people were interested) just haven't gotten to it yet.  I will. 

What are YOU all doing for Labor Day?

August Book List

77. Murder Must Advertise by Dorothy Sayers- (*****) I loved this one!  Probably one of my favorite Lord Peter mysteries.  :)  I loved Lord Peter undercover as Death Bredon.  I loved the family elements added in with Lady Mary and family.  I loved the advertising business and all the characters in it.  What an excellent piece of work this book is. 

78. The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey- (*****) Surprisingly just as good as its prequel.  I love these characters!

79.  Easy to Kill by Agatha Christie- (***)  Kind of spooky...  Intelligent, though.  Even though I did find myself thinking "What in the world?  That's got to be the dumbest way to commit murder ever!"  I don't like it when the supposedly "Ingenius" murderer has such dumb plans.  Like replacing the cough syrup with hat paint.  Seriously?  Come on!  How exactly does the murderer KNOW that the victim will wake up in the middle of the night and drink the cough syrup when the prescription was only prescribed that morning?  How does the murderer know that IF the victim wakes up in the middle of the night to drink the cough syrup the victim will be groggy enough to just reach for the bottle without turning on a light?  How does the murderer know that the victim will drink enough of the supposed cough syrup to kill them?  Most people don't drink cough syrup right out of the bottle you know.  Most people turn on a light so they can see what they're doing when they pour the syrup into a tablespoon.  How did the murderer know that the hat paint would kill the victim?  What if it didn't?  What if they didn't drink enough?  What if the victim was only ill enough to need medical attention and when it was discovered that the victim had drunk hat paint instead of cough syrup the victim was alert enough to be able to say for certain that she had placed the COUGH SYRUP next to her bed and NOT the hat paint and that she didn't even own any hat paint let alone use it, but that she had seen for certain that exact same bottle of hat paint sitting on her employers shelf and that in fact her employer was the ONLY person who could possibly have had access to both the hat paint and the cough syrup and was therefore the only person who could have switched them while the victim was asleep. 
And if that's not bad enough... Every other murder in the book is just as "ingeniusly" planned and miraculously executed successfully.  Pushing a guy off a foot-bridge?  Seriously?  The guy drowns?  I love Agatha Christie, but even she sometimes over-reaches herself in an effort to write something new and different. 

80.  Among the Hidden by Margaret Peterson Haddix -(*****)  WOW.  Just wow.  Excellent.  I love it when a YA author writes with such depth and the reader can get an education.  Basically, Haddix is exploring the effects of a Totalitarian governnent.  In her fictional world the Government has outlawed any couple to have more than 2 children.  But, what if they have a third child?  Well, according to the government that child's life is illegal.  So, the Government takes measures.  But, suppose you don't want your child murdered by your government?  Suppose you are the third child?  Suppose you could never look out of a window or turn on a light for fear someone was watching?  What if you couldn't even eat at the table with your family because someone might count the shadows through the window shade?  Haddix's characters are extremely easy to love and understand.  I'm looking forward to more installments in this series.  Easy read.  160 some pages.  Couple of hours reading. 

81.  Among the Imposters by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (*****) Second book in the Shadow Children series.  Very good.

82.  Among the Betrayed by Margaret Peterson Haddix- (****) Shadow Children, book 3.  This book followed different characters which always takes me a little time to get used to in a series.  You know... I open the book expecting to hear more about Luke and instead I'm reading about Nina.  Mild disappointment for 5 pages or so.  Then I got into her story.  This one was a bit predictable and while there were other characters I felt like I was only really supposed to be interested in Nina.  So, it was a little closed and not quite as edge-of-your-seat.  Nina isn't as likeable of a character to begin with.  She's the kind of character who's side you're on against your better judgement.  But, I have a feeling this sort of reader/character relationship is exactly what Haddix was going for.  So, in that case...  She did an excellent job! 

83.  April Lady by Georgette Heyer- (***) This book took me forever to get into.  I kept reading and reading and reading and not really feeling exhilerated about it, but by the time I realized I wasn't ever going to feel exhilerated about it I was halfway through the book and (in spite of myself) I wanted to see what happened.  And I confess I had a tiny hope that it might somehow get better.  Or, that the ending would make the dullness of everything else make sense.  Now, don't get me wrong.  There's really nothing wrong with this book.  It's well written.  The characters are extremely well developed and understandable.  It's a period piece and the descriptions were all very vivid and not overdone.  The kind of book where you read it and can see it playing out in your head.  The entire story was not in the least unlikely or unbelievable.  It was just sort of... boring.  At least for me.  I guess it's just not the sort of book I'm used to reading.  If you love Jane Austen and are looking for more books in that vein you might want to give Georgette Heyer a try.  Her books are considered classics.  She wrote some mysteries... I think I'll try some of those.  :)

Dr. Jak's Fall Fashion Tips

What's in for fall?

Glad you asked!

Because Fall is one of my FAVORITE seasons!  I LOVE fall!! I love the smell of it and the colors and the FASHION!

Fall is a super season for dressing great because there's so much more room for creativity.  Mainly because you can wear MORE clothes and you can mix and match so many more pieces of your wardrobe.

For instance:

• Try your darker toned summer shirts with a cardigan over top.  
• Wear your capris with knee-high boots
• Pull out your heavier sweaters and wear them with a shorter skirt or capris
• And WAY exciting!  You can wear TIGHTS!  

Here's some tips on what's in for fall 2009

Knee High Boots.  If you do not already own a pair of knee high boots I highly suggest you make the investment.  You will wear them ALL THE TIME.  Make sure you get a pair you're comfortable in.  I wear mine almost exclusively in the winter.  Granted I live North :)  and almost can't step out of my front door without stepping into at least 6 inches of snow.  Which means that in a regular pair of flats my socks would be soaked in a matter of 22 seconds.  So.  I wear boots.  And you should too.  :)  Plus, they look cool.  :)

Belts. Big belts.  Of course these are designed to accentuate the oh-so-perfect waists of the oh-so-perfect.  But, look at how cool that big belt looks tied over that chunky sweater!  It almost inspires me to start doing crunches.  :) 

The Layered Look I couldn't find any really good pictures of this but I'm sure you all know what the layered look is.  Basically, layers.  :)  Mix and match textures to really get the look you want.  And if you're feeling REALLY adventurous, try mixing up patterns!







Chunky, Statement Jewelry in Autumn Hues.  Big is in.  If your necklace reaches your waist, that's good.  :) 

Fall is your chance to wear those yummy metallic colors.  Gold, Copper, Burgundy...  Have FUN with it!

What I ACTUALLY got done last weekend

• Painting
• Half cleaning the bathroom (after we were done painting it)
• Took Luke and Sarah B. for a celebratory smoothie in honor of finishing their summer reading program
• Watched a creepy movie (And Then There Were None) :)
• Church
  
• Baptism after Church
• Picnic after Baptism after Church
• Went to a wake
• Read a few more pages in my book

That's it..

And it's a COLD Monday. 

I love fall... I really do... but, isn't this a little early???

And does winter REALLY have to come next??? 

*pouts*

Things I want to do this weekend

Bullet Style: :)

• Paint three rooms in my house
• Read 4 books
• Clean the kitchen
• Clean the bathroom
• Clean the living room
• Fertilize my plants
• Find some snowboots to buy so I can give Mom's back to her
• Get a haircut?
• Make a whole bunch of pesto and freeze it
• (Find a food-processor so I can make said pesto)
• Relax (HAH!)
• Grocery Shopping
• Plan meals for upcoming week
• Organize my budget

Can I do it all?

Being Like Jesus

"That is why He warned people to “count the cost”
before becoming Christians.
“Make no mistake,” He says, “if you let me, I will make you perfect.
The moment you put yourself in my hands, that is what you are in for.
Nothing less, or other than that." –C.S. Lewis

To be like Jesus

To be like Jesus

All I ask is to be like Him
All through life's journey
From earth to glory
All I ask is to be like Him.

For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are
not worthy to be compared with the glory

which shall be revealed in us.

-Romans 8:18

Cartoon Song by Chris Rice

LOL!!

Headaches can ruin one's week.

I've had one for a couple of days.

I don't think I've really talked about this much here, but headaches are a common thing for me. TOO common. It's not unusual for me to have a headache that lasts a week. Or two weeks. Or, in extreme cases, 2 months...

I've been known to cry at the discovery that I'm out of Ibuprofen.

But, there are some things I've learned that I'm determined to be thankful for in spite of the pain.

• An ice pack to the back of the neck can numb the pain and bring sweet relief. (something to look forward to after work)
• Reading sometimes makes the headache worse but I read anyway. Because reading takes my mind off it, and it's theraputic.
• Ibuprofen. My #1 Do NOT leave the house without it.
• Water. A gallon a day is good. :)
• I'm thankful that my job isn't too strenuous. I'm thankful that I have a lot of quiet days.
• I'm thankful for my massage therapist. And I wish I could see her more. But, $50 for an hour? I'm not made of money people!
• Laughter. It really does make me feel better.
• I'm thankful that His MERCIES are new EVERY morning. 'Cause most mornings I need a fresh batch of them to help me through the day.
  

The War Between The Sexes, part 2

Way back last December I published an article called The War Between The Sexes 


The following question was left in the comment section of that article (on the The IDD Blog) and I have not addressed it yet. Frankly because I had no idea how to answer. 

Here's the question:



What is a girl to do when she hears other girls putting guys down? Comments in their defense can be misconstrued, but to stand by silently can be equal to condoning the behavior. I've been there more than once. Do you have suggestions or examples to share of things that have worked for you?



It's really not so much of an issue for me, personally, anymore.  I'm 27 and I don't know many guys my age.  When I hear girls making disparaging remarks about boys I can usually safely speak up in the guys' defense just on the foundation of being A) older and B) obviously NOT defending a guy because I have feelings for him.  But, I clearly remember being in my teens and the awkwardness of being involved in these conversations. 


Essentially you have two choices in such a situation.  You can say nothing.  In which case you may know that you don't approve but most likely no one else will.  And if you aren't going to voice your disapproval, it will be assumed that you approve.  OR, you can say SOMETHING.  But, what to say?  How do you speak up in the defense of the defenseless without looking like you have hidden agendas?



Going against the grain is difficult in any situation.  And I'm definitely one of those people that avoids debate at all costs.  But, when we look at the big picture we have to realize how harmful this kind of talk can be.  Girls that put down guys by way of scornful remarks and ridicule them behind their backs are harming themselves more than the guys in the long run.  Let's face it.  We NEED guys.  This world could not continue without guys.  Every girl wants to get married someday, right?  Does she plan to continue these kind of remarks with regards to her husband?  I hope not. 


In matters of speaking up for truth, and taking the side of righteousness I hope you will never hesitate.  Sometimes taking the less popular side can be equal to stepping into the line of fire.  It can open you up to even more ridicule. 


Believe me.  I've been there.  But, someone must stand on the side of righteousness.  Be the one that's a cut above the normal.  I'd like to encourage you to take the road less travelled.  Ask the question "What Would Jesus Do?"  It's worth it in the end. 

There are sometimes ways of addressing these issues without going full tilt into rebuking the offenders.  It really depends on the situation and the people involved of course, but I would encourage you to try to develop some diplomatic and kind ways of addressing disparaging attitudes and remarks without causing offense.  You do NOT want to start a war or make anyone feel bad because they made a remark in a bad moment. 

These tips should go for any situation, not just standing up for the guys.  Sometimes guys say things about girls that should be refuted.  Sometimes children say things about parents, or vice versa.  Strive to be a peacemaker in any situation.

Some tips:


Don't:

Adopt a "Holier-Than-Thou" attitude.

Beat a dead horse.  If you've made your point and people choose not to listen that's their problem (to put it bluntly).



Do:

Speak up if you feel a situation is getting out of control. 

Try to be a peacemaker


Does anyone have any experiences they would like to share? 

Or, questions? 

Leave them in the comments!

Random-ness

• I'm going shopping I guess.  Why am I not more excited?  Well... I don't have much money to shop with.  I have a headache.  I feel hermit-ish and want to stay in.  That's why.  :)
• I have discovered Pandora.  I LOVE it.  You should SO check it out if you haven't already.  Basically, it's internet radio.  You can create a station by typing in an artist you like or a song you like, or whatever.  Then that station will only play similar music.  It's SO cool.  Right now I am being lulled and comforted by gorgeous piano music on my Jon Schmidt station. 
• You all know who Jon Schmidt is right?  I think most everyone has seen his AMAZING video on YouTube of his arrangement of Love Story/Viva la Vida.  Here's a link if you haven't seen it   I was never a huge "Love Story" fan before I heard this arrangement of it.  :)
• While we're talking about links...  I'm on Goodreads if anyone else is and wants to add me.  If you're NOT on Goodreads but you're a reader and love to share books and talk about books, you should check it out.  If you want to add me you can e-mail me your info at flowershopgirlblog@gmail.com and I'll add you.
• I'm loving the Mysterious Benedict Society books right now and everyone should read them.  :)
• Ok, enough of my random-ness.  Have a great weekend everybody!
  

What's in a name?

Please tell me I'm not the only one who does this.  I like to name my belongings.  Ok, not EVERYTHING.  Just the expensive and meaningful ones that are closest to my heart.  My car, computer, etc.  Is this strange?
I have some theories.

Perhaps it's my mother-nature that has long been unfulfilled.  You know?  Like, I don't have any children to name and nurture so I'm releasing all the pent-up mother-feelings on the only things that truly are MINE.
OR
I have an over-active imagination.  *looks around* ok, SHHH... I DO sometimes talk to my named posessions.  But, don't worry.  They don't talk back.  Yet.
OR
I've read too many old books.  You know in old books everybody names everything.  Heroines name their pianos.  Heros name their gallent steeds.  (Granted everyone names their horses, but still... I don't have a horse to gallop bravely on, I have a car to ride bravely in.  Same difference, right?)

Actually, any of the above theories is quite plausible.

So, please tell me someone out there has named their computer.  Maybe your laptop would like to meet my laptop?  Laptop play date?  My laptop is 6 years old, but I only recently adopted her.  Her name is Tuppence.  Stop laughing.  I spent a long time picking out a name for her.  I think it's very fitting.  After all she helps me find things all the time.  We're a regular pair of detectives.  And besides, my sister wouldn't let me name her Nancy Drew.

My car is 6 1/2 years old and deep blue.  His name is Lord Peter Death Bredon Wimsey.  (Just Wimsey for short)  Because I had a crush on Lord Peter when I named him.  And because the Wimsey family motto is (quite fittingly) "As My Wimsey Takes Me."  Wimsey has taken me many places.  Although, mostly just to work and back.  Wimsey and I have been through LOTS together and I love him.  Wimsey takes much better care of me than I take of him.  Which reminds me, he needs an oil change...

When I was the "Machine Cleaner in Residence" at DQ I spent many a long and tedious morning taking apart, washing, rinsing sanitizing, drying, lubricating, re-assembling and washing the ice cream machines.  We spent so much time together that I became sort-of attached to them.  I was like their mother, you know?  If anything went wrong guess who was the first one on the spot and knew just how to fix them?  Moi.  So, naturally, I named them too.  We had two at the time.  The big double-header I named Tante.  She reminded me of the stereotypical big auntie with lots of sweets to dispense.  Or, in this case, soft serve ice cream.  She was also the most finicky and tempermental.  Not that Aunties are finicky and tempermental.  She just was.  The other single header machine I named Pip.  I don't actually remember why.  It might have been short for Pipsqueak.  Or, I might have recently finished reading Great Expectations.  Come to think of it, I'm sure that was it.

That's one of my weaknesses.  The minute I finish a book I love I want to name something after one of the characters.  I had a cat named Cosette (Les Miserables) once.  And of course a dog named Bella (Our Mutual Friend).  Wimsey was named during my Wimsey stage.  (Ok, not actually OUT of that stage yet.).  And of course, Tuppence... well, I'm always in an Agatha Christie stage.  After I read The Count of Monte Cristo I named my piano Valentine.  Which name only stuck for a month or so.

Anyway, when I left DQ I handed the job of "Chief Machine Mechanic" over to my brother.  Within 2 months he had RE-NAMED MY MACHINES!  Can you believe it!?!  of all the nerve!  And even worse...  prepare yourself.  He put absolutely no thought or imagination into naming them at all.  I'm pretty sure he just said the first two names that popped into his head.  Pete.  and Leroy.  Uh huh.  I joke not. 

I have other belongings that are close to my heart and yet to be named.  It's a serious matter.  A lot of thought has to be put into it.  It will be interesting to see how long it takes me to name my children. 



My coffeemaker for instance is red and adorable, so I'm thinking of calling her Florence.  Don't try to follow the logic.  There isn't any. 

And my phone!  What should I name my phone!  It's almost never more than one layer of denim away from me.  It's my lifeline, my texting machine, my clock, my connection to my family and my organizer.  I keep my "to-do" lists in it, my grocery list, my half started articles, my random thoughts that need to be captured before they're gone for ever into nothingness.  I couldn't live without my phone!  She needs a name!  Help!

My Vacation in Review: just the highlights

• Arriving at our hotel in Massachusetts! After 18 hours in the car and one night in a nasty hotel (the kind of hotel that requires mom to tell us to "pile your suitcases in front of the door" !!!) we were SO glad to finally unload our two cars and crash in a nice, clean environment.

• Tour of BOSTON!!! Oh my goodness!!! My history loving family had the time of our lives driving around Boston in a tour bus. We saw just about everything you could want to see in Boston. Key points of interest being: The Old North Church, and the DUCKLINGS!!!!

Not the actual ducklings of course. These statues of them. We asked the driver if we would be able to see the ducklings and he said "No. We drive by the park but there are too many trees in the way." :( Very sad. We just said "Ok, thanks." Next thing we knew the driver is turning down a "No buses" street and we're going right past the Boston Public Gardens and we see them! We all started shouting and pointing and laughing and whipped out the camera but didn't manage to get a decent picture. If you're clueless about why the ducklings are SO exciting, and wanna hear the story let me know. Otherwise, just know that this was definitely a highlight for our family!

• SO many exciting things in BOSTON! I'm going to upload some pictures and share more then.

• Teddy Bear Factory and tour (SO cute!)

• CHOCOLATE factory tour!
  

• THE IDD REUNION!!!!! Or, actually, I guess we should call it the IDD UNION since most of us had never met before. 13 girls, talking, laughing, shopping, movies, chocolate, picnics, being goofy, sharing, cooking, eating, toe-nail painting... and SO much more. I can't even remember everything and if I think about how much I'm going to miss all those wonderful girls I'll probably start crying again. Don't know what IDD is? you can Join in the fun!

• Going to Canada. I had never been to Canada. Now I can add it to the list of countries I've been to. The list is growing slowly, and it's kind of fun to see! Sadly, though I did not get a stamp in my passport. What's up with that?

• Niagara Falls! Again, I'll upload pictures. It was SO cool. We saw it twice, at night and in the morning. At night it's lit up with cool colored lights and in the morning it's gorgeous. Just gorgeous. Oh, by the way I had no idea that Niagara Falls was so commercialized. WAY over commercialized. Like, gag me. Vanity Fair anyone?

• The drive home. 3 torrential downpours, 14 hours in the car, almost getting STRANDED in no-man's land. We were waiting in line to go through customs and literally OUT of gas. Running on fumes I'm pretty sure. The truck has this nifty little feature that tells you how many more miles you can drive on the amount of gas you have in your tank. So, we turned it on to see how bad it was. And watched it slowly tick down the miles as we sat in line and waited to go through customs. And waited. And waited. Shifted into neutral. Waited. Waited. 6 cars in front of us. Taking an average of 3-5 minutes each to go through. 2 miles of driving gas left. And we lose a mile every 5 minutes. You do the math. Thank God for a shift changed in border patrol guards. Guard number two started whipping cars through at a rate of 45 seconds per car. Can you imagine how awkward it would be to run out of gas in the customs line? Not fun, I'm sure. We limped to a gas station and filled up. :)
  

• Finally arriving home at midnight last night. Stumbling to bed and then reading for an hour because I was too keyed up to sleep.

• Waking up this morning in my own bed :)

What We Know

 And we know that all things 

work together for good to them that 

love God, 

to them who are the called according to his purpose. 

 -Romans 8:28

Right now may not be one of the "GOOD" times in your life.  But, I guarantee it's a time that's "working together" TOWARDS the good. 

I know that feeling of being lost, or swirling in current out of our control and wondering "how can THIS be God?"  

Imagine you're in a raft, floating on a river.  You can't see around the corner, you don't know what's ahead, but high above you is a helicopter.  The person in the helicopter can see the entire river.  They can see where you started,  they see where you'll end.  They see every rough spot along the way and they help you along by encouraging you through a walkie-talkie.  Are you going to turn your walkie talkie off?  

  For as the heavens are 

higher than the earth, so are my ways 

higher than your ways, 

and my thoughts than your thoughts.
-Isaiah 55:9

July Book List

Another month short on reading.  Very sad.  But, on the bright side every book I read (all FOUR of them) were wonderful.  All highly recommended so check them out!


I'm in high hopes of having a much longer book list in August.  :)


73.  The Tuesday Club Murders by Agatha Christie- (*****)  Love Miss Marple.  Love her.  :) Short stories.  All told in retrospect, drawing room style.  Totally cute. 

74.  Ten Books That Screwed Up The World and Five Others That Didn't Help by Benjamin Wiker, PH.D.- (*****)  EXCELLENT.  Highly recommended.  Concise, clearly written and explained.  Highly, highly recommended.  PG-13 rating, for sure, though, so I recommend parents reading first.  Otherwise, absolutely a must read.  It's a detailed review/exposing of the fallacies that have been inflicted upon the world since Machievelli first wrote his book "The Prince" in 1513.  Definitely an eye-opener. 

75.  The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Lee Stewart -(*****) Very, very good.  Highly recommended!  Excellently written, powerful plot, loveable characters and some thrill.  Perfect.  Reminded me of Lemony Snicket in a couple of places and THAT'S always good.  :)  Also squeaky clean and suitable for any age!  There's a sequel!  Oh, yippee!

76. Gaudy Night by Dorothy Sayers-( *****)  Love it.  Love it, love it, love it.  *huge grins*  And I can't really tell you why because it's all spoilers but if you're a Lord Peter fan you have to read it.  You know how when you fall in love with a character you are so happy when THEY fall in love because you can be in love with them vicariously?  Make sense?  No?  Ok, whatever.  Anyway, I'm pretty sure Dorothy Sayers fell in love with her own creation and created a little romance for him to satisfy herself.  Anyway.  The mysterious was fabulous too.  Actually, I really appreciated the mystery.  For one thing it was *gasp* NOT a murder.  I kept expecting someone to die tragically but no one ever did.  And, actually I had figured the whole thing out before Lord Peter announced it, but oddly enough that didn't bother me.  Ordinarily I like a mystery to have a surprise ending.  I like to be impressed with the detective's abilities.  I like it when all the clues are there but the author gives them to you so cleverly that you don't know they're clues.  So, in theory my kind of mystery means a book which gives me a mystery and all the clues and I COULD solve it if I really paid attention and dissected enough, but also disguises the clues well enough that when it's all explained in the end I can say "AH... now it makes sense, I should've seen it all along."  But, after reading SO many mysteries in my long and brilliant career as a reader-sleuth there aren't a whole lot of books that can do that for me.  I've gotten too experienced at how to read a mystery I guess.  So, that's one of the reasons I love authors like Agatha Christie and Dorothy Sayers.  They're both such ingenious authors that I don't always figure it out before the end of the book.  Ok, I'm totally off subject now...  Anyway, like I said I had figured out the mystery but for some reason it didn't bother me.  I was too caught up in the beauty of it.